Nashville Years II (Related Diary Entries I)

Not exactly as I remembered it in my last post but close, allowing 30 years or so for memory decay. According to my diary—"Captain's Log"—for this time period, Ron and I met Earl in November 1981. We returned to Nashville on 15 December to sign the contracts and receive $2,000 as an advance; I got $1,500, and Ron's 25% gave him $500.

From 2 December 1981

This musician's life can, at this point, be very boring. I sit around all day and night reading, listening to music and watching TV. I try to write but I'm so bored there is little inspiration and when the inspiration comes, I am so fidgety waiting for something to happen, inspired thoughts are lost before I can even sit down. This becomes very frustrating because I can get very cranky when I am not writing because it is now as much a part of my life as sleep or Mountain Dew or late night TV.

There are 3 songs I recorded in Nashville last month which, I'm afraid, are going to have to be on the album. I don't want them on the album but it seems I have little control over that. It's not that they aren't good songs, I just like mine better. I feel the real reason for this is at this point I view myself as a songwriter solely. Once the recording artist/performer actually comes into a reality, I may be more comfortable with the idea of having to do other people's songs, but as of now, viewing myself as a songwriter, it hurts my self-image and confidence. Once I hear my own songs fully recorded, my ideas may change but I doubt they will until I actually begin performing and/or one of those songs becomes a hit. I cannot say at this time what the album will consist of, but I do feel that it will be very good.

From 19 January 1982

Delays and more delays! Earl has had problems with collecting money so as a result both mine and Ron's checks have bounced. Then, in trying to right the whole thing, recording was postponed and now things look like it will be February before we start. I'm being patient enough I guess but we've had snows and ice storms so I've been cooped up here at the house for quite a while and now have a definite case of cabin fever; I'm stark raving stir crazy. I keep thinking about the album and what I'm gonna be able to get on it and what it's gonna come out sounding like . . . I'm about to explode! I've almost finished a rocker called "Some Kind of Magic" and I feel I'd like to record it; if need be in the place of "Fallin' For You Again." Also, there is a new slow ballad called "Just Can't Find the Words" and I'd like to put that on the album. So many to choose from now that I cannot allow, if at all possible, anything outside of my own to show up on the record.